"K" is for Kabbalah

I have begun a study of Kabbalah. Or maybe, more accurately, Qabalah with a "Q", as it is the hermetic form of Kabbalah that interests me most.

As I am merely a beginning student (and will probably consider myself so even after years of study), I don't have many words of wisdom to impart! So  instead,  for this week's Pagan Blog Project entry, I post a few images of Kabbalah that caught my eye:

"J" is for: Is it My Job?

I’ve received many responses to my post  A Witch Who Cannot Hex, Cannot Heal, (“H” for the Pagan Blog Project). The majority have been supportive and positive. Some people have even said that they have felt liberated by what I said. Wow! Other people have disagreed, and that’s fine. Not everyone is going to be comfortable with the ideas in the post.

But one argument stands out for me as totally absurd: that I shouldn't write these things because  it will give the rest of the world the wrong impression about Witches; that it only confirms to the world that Witches are all about curses, people will take it the wrong way...Etc.

Oh, please! Why should I be responsible for what other people think? I can’t control that. It’s not my job to try. I don't represent all Witches everywhere, and though yes, I expect that my words could influence thought, its not my job to control the outcome of this influence. I am reminded  of what’s been said a thousand times to LGBT people by other LGBT people: that they should modify their behavior (i.e. not be too “flamboyant” or demonstrative) in order to be “accepted” by society. Oh yank, yank, yank. How does that usually turn out? The same has been said to every oppressed group in history, from women to African Americans, to indigenous tribes everywhere, to Witches.

For this week’s Pagan Blog Project post, I am inspired to write for “J”: “Is it my ‘Job’?”.

My job, and the job of Witches, is to answer to our higher selves, and to embrace our CALLING. Not to obsess about what the neighbors will think. I am not saying that sometimes it is not necessary to stay on the down low for self-protection. That is survival, and I get that. But to be less than oneself in order to “accepted”? Ha! News flash ya’ll: if you have to make yourself smaller for anyone, they’re not going to accept you anyway. That’s how it is, that’s how it’s always been, and that is how it will be. Don’t you think that the witches who were hung and burned thought about modifying their behavior to get along before they ended up on the stake or gallows? Don’t you think that many tried this to see if maybe they could be “accepted”? Besides, you’re not being accepted if you are changing who you are. Some charade that you are acting out is being merely tolerated.

I had a long conversation with Laurie Cabot the other day, as we were preparing for my interview with her about her days as a Bellydancer. (interview to appear in Belly Dance New England magazine soon!) We talked about this idea of one’s calling, and how it is essential that, in order to be truly empowered to answer a calling, one MUST NOT entertain the smallness of some minds. To do so is pointless and a waste of energy. Laurie Cabot is one who has sacrificed a great deal to be true to herself as a Witch, as an artist, and as a woman over many decades. Though she has paid the price, she still felt that it was essential, for true sovereignty over one’s life as a Witch and/or simply as a human being, that we not expend energy what “those people” say.

Jungian psychologist James Hillman, in his book The Soul’s Code: In Search of Character and Calling, talks a great deal about the dangers of not answering the call that comes from within. He says that we are all born with an “acorn” (seed) or “daimon” (not demon, read carefully, please). He asserts that when the daimon within is thwarted for whatever reason (“acceptance” by society? “Sacrificing” for the “sake of the kids”?) the person becomes twisted up and passes this fucked-up-ness down into the next generations. He says that in order to have a healthy, empowered life, one must answer the calling fully. This is not a selfish act; on the contrary, it creates an empowered path to health that is then passed down to those who come after. And check it out: we then become the best elders and ancestors we can be! How about it? Win-win.

Whatever our stance on hexing and healing, I think that it’s a waste of time for any of us to hold back our ideas and feelings just because “we’re not accepted in society yet.” Seriously? How long should we wait? I’m not holding my breath. I’m going to set my intention to do my real job, which is to be myself, fully and lovingly. Acceptance starts within.

And as within, so without.

Happy May Day! A Blessed Beltaine to you!!!

Blessed Beltaine to all my friends near and far! And a very blessed Samhain to my friends in the southern half of  Gaia.

I am loving this video slideshow of the Betaine Fire Festival  in Edinburgh, Scotland, and I intend to make it my business to be there next year!




Love and Eros,
Aepril

serpent moon

Please visit my dance and health diary, serpent moon. I write for one cycle of the moon, new moon to new moon, to create better habits and authentically chronicle my practice.

serpent moon:
http://serpentmoondance.blogspot.com/

Hekate, and Aiming Above Morality

Tonight is the Dark of the Moon. It is Hekate's time.

I work with Hekate tonight. She has called me to that. Her call is unmistakable to me, like the time at Winter Solstice 2011 when I stood outside at the crossroads, the liminal space where all is possible and ghosts dwell. Here in Salem, there was an odd winter thunderstorm, and the thunder clapped and boomed, and lightning flashed. Hekate blew the wind through my damp hair, lovingly hissing that yes, change is coming, yes it is. Use your power. Do not pull punches now. Curse, elbow, cut, hex, do what you have to. I'm counting on you to find your way.

The Sun stood still.

And then the Son was born during the night, amid the thunder and wind and rain. And I, one person among billions in the world, felt the awesome power of this difficult birth. Hecate, goddess overseeing childbirth, merged with the Black Madonna for me. The Dark Goddess as One, they were, we were, the Night giving birth to the Divine Child.

We are all the Dark. We are all the Divine Child. We are always both, and contain both within.

The Dark Moon is tonight.Hekate's time.

 The dark moon is a perfect time for divination. And so I pulled a card from the Dion Fortune deck. It was the Ace of Wands, "ROOT OF THE POWERS OF FIRE". The caduceus is shining, with the Sun sitting on top. The card is inspiration and creativity, of living spontaneously and owning power. It is a symbol of psychopomp Mercury, who, like Hekate, is a liminal divinity.

I think of trickster Maude's statement in the 70's cult movie Harold and Maude, " Vice, Virtue. It's best not to be too moral. You cheat yourself out of too much life. Aim above morality. If you apply that to life, then you're bound to live life fully.".

I will go and be with this Goddess tonight. I like Her darkness, and Her liminality. I shall accept change, I own my power, and I aim above morality, so I may live more fully.

I leave you with this video by Hekate devotee Jade Sol Luna, called "Witch Moon". I appear in it as Hekate several times, dancing.




Hail Hekate!

A Witch Who Cannot Hex, Cannot Heal ("H" is for Hexing and Healing)

“A Witch who Cannot Hex, Cannot Heal…”.
 This statement is often met with a sharp intake of breath, as though the utterance of the statement is in itself a curse.

  But don’t you know about the threefold law? I do know that some people believe in that law, but I do not. Experience has shown me that there are laws in Nature of cause and effect, that there is the power of intention and attraction, and that all things are interconnected. Nature is not moral; She just IS. She wants balance most of all.

 I think of Jung’s concept of The Shadow. We all have it; we all have dark unconscious material that exists inside the psyche, places that we cannot or will not accept. Places that we’ve pushed down, or shut out, or just don’t know are there, but guide and inform our actions nonetheless.

 I think that if one is to do magick well and with real ovarios, one must be able to truly see oneself authentically. Otherwise there is too much unconscious shadow in the working. If one sees oneself as a practitioner of Light and Healing only, then its almost 100% likely that there is a lot of shadow material present. No one is all light and goodness. To see oneself in this way is willful naiveté. It’s also dangerous. The brightest light casts the darkest shadow.

 I think that in order to be a powerful, empowered Witch, one has to be aware of, and accept, Shadow. We have to know that we have Shadow, and to embrace this part of ourselves. A Witch who is worth her salt must be able to travel into the Underworld and deal with the Shades and Shadows who live there. Like Persephone, we all must become initiated Queen in our own personal Underworld spaces.

 Part of the job of the Queen of Darkness is the ability to curse. It’s just a part of the deal. We must have the balls to use this power sometimes. Not a lot. Not every time someone gives us a hard time. But when it counts, we need to know what we are doing. And we can’t be guilty or ashamed about it. It needs to be owned.

 Because of the laws of Nature, we curse knowing that it will come back to us. "When you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you."--Friedrich Nietzsche. We lose innocence. Maybe more. But this is the part that takes courage. This is the sacrifice.

 Scorpio, the 8th sign of the Zodiac and ruled by Pluto (Persephone), is the sign that deals with both hexing and healing. Scorpio natives are known for being the best in the Zodiac at seeing deeply into any situation. When unevolved, Scorpio can be all too ready with her stinger when she feels crossed. Then, maybe the need for a new way to handle things comes along, a need to integrate the dark psyche to become more whole emerges. There can be resistance, swinging the other way, a time of going through a “no, not me, I only use MY powers for good!” denial stage. But when evolved, she soars above resentment and denial, and uses her deep powers for knowing the right time for the right medicine.

 We all have Scorpio somewhere in our astrological charts, representing the area in which these transformations can happen.

 “Enlightenment is not imagining figures of light but making the darkness conscious.”--Carl Gustav Jung

I think of the veterinarian who has to euthanize the 4 legged. Or the surgeon who must cut into the body to get to the cancer. The friend who must tell the friend about the infidelity. The Fall that takes away the Summer, and the Winter that must give birth to the Spring. Where does the healing end and the hexing begin? And vice versa? They are two sides of the same thing.

Published as a participant in the Pagan Blog Project. This week's theme is "H". 

"G" is for Gwyddion the magick dog

Photo by Pamela Joye

Gwyddion has been a part of our family now for over 6 weeks. A rescue dog from Arkansas, Gwyddie has taken to his New England digs like a fish to water.

A slippery fish at that! Gwyddion was aptly named for the Welsh Trickster-Magician-Hero of Welsh mythology. He is a tricky little fellow, part Blue Heeler (Australian Cattle Dog) and, we think, part Pointer. He is quite a joker, clowning at every opportunity he can get, hiding my things, throwing his tennis ball for himself, running faster than the speed of sound, disrupting everything I try to do around the house, highly curious about everything, and even disappearing once or twice.

Photo by Pamela Joye

Gwyddion came to us with the name "DC", short for "Diamond City". His Foster Mom tells me that he was found after he approached the mayor of Diamond City, AR, at their annual Fall fair. (Right to the top!) The mayor was kind enough to take him in, but by law she had to pass him onto the city pound in order to give his "owners" the opportunity to claim him.

They didn't.

Photo by Pamela Joye

So, after 15 days, Gwyddion, aka DC, was released to the rescue group Ozark Homeward Bound. He remained in his foster home with his foster mom Jacki until he was adopted by us!

And how did he end up being found by his parents in Salem, MA all the way from AR?

I was perusing rescue sites online looking up Blue Heelers for adoption. And there was his face! I knew right away that he was the boy for our family.

Deep in contemplation of the wonders of nature in the Salem Woods

I emailed OHB, and they sent me more info about him, along with the phone # for his foster mother. Jacki and I had one of many long conversations about "DC", partly in order to determine if we were a good match.

It seems we were. The day that DC/Gwyddion was transported here from AR (covered as part of his adoption fee along with neutering and shots) is one of the high points of our lives! Michael and I couldn't be happier, Gwyddie brings us so much joy!

And Gwyddie has helped heal our hearts after losing Coda, our infinitely beloved wolf-dog who passed away a few years ago. although I can't help but wish that I had the both of them with me forever. Big and little, King and Jester.

He loves to be chased--and to chase!

And as a public service announcement, I'd like to say this: PLEASE, before you decide to go to a breeder for a dog, please consider adoption from a shelter or rescue group. So many of the Goddess's creatures are sitting in kennels, waiting to be adopted, hoping that they might be the ones to go home with someone special. Rescue dogs and cats are the best! We cannot preach about loving the Goddess and Her great earth while we ignore the possibilities that await us in the love of an animal who has already been born. Why should anyone have to feel rejected, or, worse, face the possibility of death just because no one stepped up and took them home, preferring a new puppy, bred to be bought, over them?

Many organizations will transport a four-legged right to you from far away. Salem, MA, where I live has a great shelter. (For whom the bellydance community here just raised over $1400!) so if you see a dog online and have the intuition that this may be the one for you, ask about transporting.

I can't tell you how much I LOVE GWYDDION! Our magick dog.

I have posted this as a participant in the Pagan Blog Project. This week's theme is the letter "G".

Photo by Pamela Joye