Happy May Day! A Blessed Beltaine to you!!!

Blessed Beltaine to all my friends near and far! And a very blessed Samhain to my friends in the southern half of  Gaia.

I am loving this video slideshow of the Betaine Fire Festival  in Edinburgh, Scotland, and I intend to make it my business to be there next year!




Love and Eros,
Aepril

A Witch Who Cannot Hex, Cannot Heal ("H" is for Hexing and Healing)

“A Witch who Cannot Hex, Cannot Heal…”.
 This statement is often met with a sharp intake of breath, as though the utterance of the statement is in itself a curse.

  But don’t you know about the threefold law? I do know that some people believe in that law, but I do not. Experience has shown me that there are laws in Nature of cause and effect, that there is the power of intention and attraction, and that all things are interconnected. Nature is not moral; She just IS. She wants balance most of all.

 I think of Jung’s concept of The Shadow. We all have it; we all have dark unconscious material that exists inside the psyche, places that we cannot or will not accept. Places that we’ve pushed down, or shut out, or just don’t know are there, but guide and inform our actions nonetheless.

 I think that if one is to do magick well and with real ovarios, one must be able to truly see oneself authentically. Otherwise there is too much unconscious shadow in the working. If one sees oneself as a practitioner of Light and Healing only, then its almost 100% likely that there is a lot of shadow material present. No one is all light and goodness. To see oneself in this way is willful naiveté. It’s also dangerous. The brightest light casts the darkest shadow.

 I think that in order to be a powerful, empowered Witch, one has to be aware of, and accept, Shadow. We have to know that we have Shadow, and to embrace this part of ourselves. A Witch who is worth her salt must be able to travel into the Underworld and deal with the Shades and Shadows who live there. Like Persephone, we all must become initiated Queen in our own personal Underworld spaces.

 Part of the job of the Queen of Darkness is the ability to curse. It’s just a part of the deal. We must have the balls to use this power sometimes. Not a lot. Not every time someone gives us a hard time. But when it counts, we need to know what we are doing. And we can’t be guilty or ashamed about it. It needs to be owned.

 Because of the laws of Nature, we curse knowing that it will come back to us. "When you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you."--Friedrich Nietzsche. We lose innocence. Maybe more. But this is the part that takes courage. This is the sacrifice.

 Scorpio, the 8th sign of the Zodiac and ruled by Pluto (Persephone), is the sign that deals with both hexing and healing. Scorpio natives are known for being the best in the Zodiac at seeing deeply into any situation. When unevolved, Scorpio can be all too ready with her stinger when she feels crossed. Then, maybe the need for a new way to handle things comes along, a need to integrate the dark psyche to become more whole emerges. There can be resistance, swinging the other way, a time of going through a “no, not me, I only use MY powers for good!” denial stage. But when evolved, she soars above resentment and denial, and uses her deep powers for knowing the right time for the right medicine.

 We all have Scorpio somewhere in our astrological charts, representing the area in which these transformations can happen.

 “Enlightenment is not imagining figures of light but making the darkness conscious.”--Carl Gustav Jung

I think of the veterinarian who has to euthanize the 4 legged. Or the surgeon who must cut into the body to get to the cancer. The friend who must tell the friend about the infidelity. The Fall that takes away the Summer, and the Winter that must give birth to the Spring. Where does the healing end and the hexing begin? And vice versa? They are two sides of the same thing.

Published as a participant in the Pagan Blog Project. This week's theme is "H". 

"G" is for Gwyddion the magick dog

Photo by Pamela Joye

Gwyddion has been a part of our family now for over 6 weeks. A rescue dog from Arkansas, Gwyddie has taken to his New England digs like a fish to water.

A slippery fish at that! Gwyddion was aptly named for the Welsh Trickster-Magician-Hero of Welsh mythology. He is a tricky little fellow, part Blue Heeler (Australian Cattle Dog) and, we think, part Pointer. He is quite a joker, clowning at every opportunity he can get, hiding my things, throwing his tennis ball for himself, running faster than the speed of sound, disrupting everything I try to do around the house, highly curious about everything, and even disappearing once or twice.

Photo by Pamela Joye

Gwyddion came to us with the name "DC", short for "Diamond City". His Foster Mom tells me that he was found after he approached the mayor of Diamond City, AR, at their annual Fall fair. (Right to the top!) The mayor was kind enough to take him in, but by law she had to pass him onto the city pound in order to give his "owners" the opportunity to claim him.

They didn't.

Photo by Pamela Joye

So, after 15 days, Gwyddion, aka DC, was released to the rescue group Ozark Homeward Bound. He remained in his foster home with his foster mom Jacki until he was adopted by us!

And how did he end up being found by his parents in Salem, MA all the way from AR?

I was perusing rescue sites online looking up Blue Heelers for adoption. And there was his face! I knew right away that he was the boy for our family.

Deep in contemplation of the wonders of nature in the Salem Woods

I emailed OHB, and they sent me more info about him, along with the phone # for his foster mother. Jacki and I had one of many long conversations about "DC", partly in order to determine if we were a good match.

It seems we were. The day that DC/Gwyddion was transported here from AR (covered as part of his adoption fee along with neutering and shots) is one of the high points of our lives! Michael and I couldn't be happier, Gwyddie brings us so much joy!

And Gwyddie has helped heal our hearts after losing Coda, our infinitely beloved wolf-dog who passed away a few years ago. although I can't help but wish that I had the both of them with me forever. Big and little, King and Jester.

He loves to be chased--and to chase!

And as a public service announcement, I'd like to say this: PLEASE, before you decide to go to a breeder for a dog, please consider adoption from a shelter or rescue group. So many of the Goddess's creatures are sitting in kennels, waiting to be adopted, hoping that they might be the ones to go home with someone special. Rescue dogs and cats are the best! We cannot preach about loving the Goddess and Her great earth while we ignore the possibilities that await us in the love of an animal who has already been born. Why should anyone have to feel rejected, or, worse, face the possibility of death just because no one stepped up and took them home, preferring a new puppy, bred to be bought, over them?

Many organizations will transport a four-legged right to you from far away. Salem, MA, where I live has a great shelter. (For whom the bellydance community here just raised over $1400!) so if you see a dog online and have the intuition that this may be the one for you, ask about transporting.

I can't tell you how much I LOVE GWYDDION! Our magick dog.

I have posted this as a participant in the Pagan Blog Project. This week's theme is the letter "G".

Photo by Pamela Joye 

“F” is for the Goddess Flora, and Flowers.

Spring has come early to Salem, MA. Its only March, and we’ve had many summery days already.

Next week I will be having artist Sharonn Bradbury of Witch City Ink complete my tattoo of flowers along both side of my hips and belly. We chose to do Lilies, a flower of remembrance, grieving, beauty, and also of the Goddess Lilith.

Last fall, my sister died. Not long after that, my friend and fellow bellydance artist Jeniviva Mia passed away. Both were about the same age. It was a devastating time, and my heart still hurts.

My flowers are for the mourning.

Both sister women had memorials, but in different ways. My sister was memorialized in the Black Forest of Germany during a trip where I taught and performed at Tribalfestival Offenberg. I was honored to have the support of a group of people who worked with me on a Samhain ritual. We honored the Dead by the fires in the night in the Black Forest.
Article about the ritual in hagalla Magazine.(in German)
My blog post about Germany and the Black Forest.

My friend was memorialized through a bellydance show and public ritual here in Salem, where she had twice came up from NYC to teach and perform.

My flowers are for the Dead.

Almost 5 months later, It is now Spring. The Goddess Flora is here with us already. Though her time is not “officially” until Beltaine, she is still popping up everywhere in the warm New England weather. Flora is a goddess of sex and pleasure, as well as flowers. She also has a history of honoring the Dead.

Flowers are for Death…and Eros and Rebirth.

My flowers are for the knowing that all are reborn. And all acts of Love and Pleasure are the rituals of the Goddess. That beauty is found everywhere, even–or especially--in grief and broken hearts. The flowers will move on my belly as I bellydance, continuing to explore the Mysteries of sex, love, death, transformation, spirit, beauty, darkness and light, through my art.

I have created this post as a participant in the Pagan Blog Project. 

“F” is for Forest Witch

The clearest way into the Universe is through a forest wilderness.

John Muir

I am a Shamanic Witch, and my love is the Forest. 

The Forest is symbolic of the unconscious and its mysteries. It is an entryway into the Lower world, the world of shadow and transformation. In fairytales, the heroic Princess often has to travel the forest to transform herself. She meets here the Baba Yaga, the challenging Hag, the Evil Queen, the Dark Goddess, The Black Madonna, Our Lady of the Dark Forest, Our Lady of the Great Place Below…

As I continue to explore in life, I am the naïve Princess, still. And, as an initiate of the Mysteries of the Descent, I am the dark challenging Witch as well. Both sides of me roam the Wood, in the daytime and the Night, under the New Moon, the full, and the Dark. 

 I am Raven totem; the photos posted here by Pamela Joye show a ritual done in the Salem Woods under the influence of the Crow Moon. I wear a skirt by Wings of Sin depicting the Full Moon with the Black Corvid Goddess. I am The Morrigan.

 The Moon that day was in Virgo. Virgo is Virgin, “whole unto the self”. I am the Black Madonna, Our Lady of the Black Woods. She is "black, but comely", as in the Song of Songs. The unknown one. 

Spirit of Wind blesses and clears

Calling the Quarters

Bowing to the Black Madonna

I chose this time to do Magick that protects and heals, that clears away that which no longer serves, that purifies. To this end, the Great Wind Spirits, element of air, blew with mighty force, clearing away all that was destructive to this Wood. 

 The Witch of the East pulled off my hair ornaments and blew them away, challenging my vanity. 

I walk the Forest; I hold my hands in prayer for the dispossessed, the ones who can’t speak for themselves. The Coyotes who live in this Woods, raising families and hunting for food. They are vilified, but they are here because they belong; they take the place of the Wolf who once lived here. It is the absence of the Wolf that has caused the debilitating Lyme’s disease; the Wood has its lessons, if we but listen. It is the Black Madonna that holds the Coyote and Wolf close in Her arms, protecting, respecting, cherishing.

I speak with the Spirits of the Invisisbles, the Ancestors who lived in this Forest as Natives to this land. I can only guess at and envision your powerful magic and medicine.

Also to the Fae, who live and play in this Wood.

Come away, O human child!

To the waters and the wild
With a faery hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.
~William Butler Yeats, "The Stolen Child"

The Dark Lady is also Mother to the Swans and Geese at the Forest Estuary. She protects and provides for them. And the singing birds in the trees. And the trees themselves; it is said that those who understand the trees, understands herself.  Here is where the World Tree lives. All of us ARE the World Tree, and we do best to protect and love the Forest and Her gifts, to love ourselves in our complexity. 

The Forest is a kind of sanctuary, a place to become whole again. Entry in the Online Etymology Dictionary: sanctuary 

mid-14c., "...set apart for holy worship," from Anglo-Fr. sentuarie, from O.Fr. sainctuarie, from L.L. sanctuarium "a sacred place, shrine"... . General (non-ecclesiastical) sense of "place of refuge or protection" is attested from 1560s; as "land set aside for wild plants or animals to breed and live" 

Many Blessings on you, O Great Forest!

The Grey and the Shadow

I am a Wolf mother. And I am pissed.

I just heard today about the release of a movie called The Grey. It stars Liam Neeson and is about a group of men who brave the Alaska wilderness and are attacked by a pack of Grey Wolves.

I understand that like all fictional movies, it is supposed to be fantasy. So here is what I have to say about this particular fantasy: it sucks.

Over the last few centuries wolves have been terribly persecuted, tortured, killed, and used for all sorts of reasons, including entertainment. At one point in the continental United States there were only 200 wolves left after many thousands were wiped out. For such a huge area of land that's a pitiful number. While Native Americans lived harmoniously with wolves, learning from them with respect and honor, white Europeans generally did not. In some instances wolves were captured and  their mouths wired shut and re-released into the wild to die a slow, excruciating starvation death. At one point in the Western United States there was a road made of wolf skulls. Right now there are only 2000 wolves left in the United States and they are fighting for their very survival.

In truth wolves are loving and family oriented. They shy away from humans in the wild and you'll rarely even see a wolf even in wolf country. Attacks on humans are very, very rare. At a time when they are in desperate need of our support, the release of this movie is highly irresponsible and mean.

Like women and people of color, wolves have had to bear the projection of Shadow onto them. They are depicted as dangerous, vicious, cruel, wiley, the qualities that I would say actually belong to the Sarah Palins out there who enjoy hunting them. But that's what shadow projection is, it's the pot calling the kettle black, it's a way to deny that one has qualities that they don't like to see themselves. And it's easy to project the shadow onto the voiceless. So it is up to those of us who love wolves to be their voice.

Please make your voice heard and sign the petitions by White Wolf.

And make your voice heard with your wallet, too. Do not pay to see this movie.

And as I am finishing this article, I have heard an even more gruesome thing about the harming of wolves in relation to this movie: Liam Neeson stated in an interview that he ate wolf meat as part of his preparation for filming The Grey. Read more here: Liam Neeson and ‘The Grey’ Cast Ate Wolf Meat. 

Whoa. Anybody still want to say that this is just "fantasy"?

Winslow Farm Animal Sanctuary

On Friday, Mike and I went to Winslow Farm Animal Sanctuary.

I've wanted to visit ever since I saw a spotlight on the place on NECN; it showed a peaceful place full of love for the rescued animals that resided there. Located in Norton, MA, Winslow cares for goats, horses, cats, dogs, peacocks, pigs, geese, doves, chickens, turtles, donkeys, lamas, alpacas, sheep, emus---all rescues, often from horrendous conditions. On the NECN feature, classical music played throughout the 16 acre sanctuary. On the day that I visited, the music of choice was Native American flute, encouraging serenity and healing.

Sturbridge with Goat

I of course fell in love with just about everyone I met. One of my first encounters was with a sheep named Sturbridge. Friendly and outgoing, he walked along with us on our tour of the farm. A lover of food and lots of it, he asked us a few times about maybe helping him out with some extra goodies. He later got into a scuffle with staff in the cat sanctuary when he tried to help himself to cat food. Hey, the goats were in there with the cats, why not him, too? "Out, Sturbridge!"

But wait...Why were the goats in the cat sanctuary? Well, as it happens, one of the goats was born there before it was a place for cats. He felt comfortable in this little house, so the goat stays.

This is the way it is throughout the Sanctuary: dogs hanging out with peacocks, cats with goats, lamas with geese, horses with emus. And more than amicably. In fact, many cross species friendships develop---for instance, one miniature horse loves the emus and enjoys walking with them side by side. They are quite a couple.

 Apparently there is always something new and surprising in the relationships between the residents. At one point we witnessed two doves sitting on the back of a peacock. Just hanging there. At the time we happened to be chatting with Debra, the modern St Francis who built the farm and has cared non-stop for these creatures for 25 years; when this happened between the birds, even she marveled and said she'd never seen that before. A sign of peace and beauty maybe.

Peacock on goat house

Not all is peace though. We did happen to witness a comedic duel between two emus. Well, OK, comedic to us, but serious business for the birds! The emus get along throughout the rest of the year, but come summer, watch out! It's mating season, and although there are no females at the farm to fight over, they still intend to keep their toe claws sharp and duke it out over territory. See video of staff breaking up the fisticuffs (no one got hurt!)

Emu video:
http://youtu.be/_Z7msJ1yxD4

Many of the stories are very sad. Like the ones who were nearly starved to death, or beaten, or lost limbs due to abuse or neglect. Some have psychological scars that are difficult to heal. A beautiful white cat named Spirit was left in a cage for 1 year with no room to move. When he was brought to the Sanctuary, he walked in circles for months, not sure how to use open space, not wanting to ever stop walking, not wanting to ever be confined again.

But these are survivors. A motley crew of the Goddess's creatures who got another chance and have taken it. Debra tries to find suitable happy homes for all before taking them into the Sanctuary; in this way she can keep the Sanctuary going for those who can't be placed elsewhere. But really, this is THE place to be for healing if you've got wings or four legs. Pandy the sheep dog, greeted us at the door, ready for action. At 13, she is so well cared for that she still loves the chase a pine-cone over and over to exhaustion.

Pandy (left)

The staff is all volunteer. The Sanctuary is run on fundraising and donations. They are also funded on admission fees ($7). Consider visiting :
Winslow Farm

37 Eddy Street
Norton, MA 02766-3513
(508) 285-6451

I miss being a forest witch

I miss being a forest witch!

(Right after I wrote the above statement, a cacophony of crows and jays began calling! I love corvids!)

I love Salem, don't get me wrong. Witch City, indeed! But it's a suburb. I am wishing for more breathing room again. I would love more isolation, more room to be with the forest, listening and working and playing in it.

I've lived like this before...years ago. And while I don't want to be so far away as to give up the artistic and social culture that more populated places have to offer, I miss the voices and quiet of the woods.

Prayer of St Francis, Patron saint of animals, nature, and the environment

I was reminded of The Prayer of St Francis as Mike and I stood by a statue of St Francis last night. It was a beautiful summer night, and our thoughts, as they often do, turned to Coda. Standing next to the Protector of animals and nature, my thoughts also turned to the animal sanctuary I hope to create someday.

The Prayer of St Francis was a consolation to me when Coda died almost 3 years ago. (St Francis's wolf died of old age, too.)

It is also a reminder to me that no matter how despairing I may feel about the health of the planet and cruelty toward animals (so-called "domestic and wild), it is my internal peace and the quality of my own heart and thoughts that will bring healing magick into the world. Staying centered in a loving heart best equips me to help and heal. I WILL be able to give more creatures a place to call home. Coda will help guide me, as will St Francis.

 Prayer of St Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.